5 Relationship Secrets That Will Make Your Marriage Last
At the beginning of a relationship, you may be caught up in the throes of bliss like everyone else and may not be thinking about any problems or difficulties that stand in the way of your happiness. But the reality is that merging your life with another person can be demanding to both parties, particularly if you lack substantial experience in relationships, and not all marriages have happy endings.
According to experts, there is a 39% possibility for couples in the US to divorce or separate. While there are different reasons why many relationships end this way, a major underlying cause is the frequent disregard or lack of knowledge of the fact that successful marriages do not occur by chance.
For a marriage to thrive, it requires persistent effort, dedication, love, and, most importantly, respect from both parties. But at the same time, no marriage experiences constant happiness, so don’t expect a perfect relationship. Instead, it is normal to have occasional arguments or rough patches with your spouse, and what matters is how you work together to face these issues as a team.
Tips To A Healthy And Long-Lasting Marriage
A harmonious and respectful marriage doesn’t happen by coincidence or chance. You and your spouse need to take conscious and intentional steps toward building a healthy relationship in order to rise above the conflicts and emerge stronger than ever.
Remember that a marriage is essentially a partnership and demands the active participation of both partners. Here are some essential aspects you can focus on daily to ensure the success of your marriage:
- Maintain Open Communication
One cornerstone of a healthy marriage is open communication, which involves creating a safe space where both partners feel comfortable sharing their needs, thoughts, and feelings without fear of judgment or criticism. Honesty and acceptance are crucial in achieving this, and it’s best to express yourself using “I” statements to avoid blame or accusation. Keep your tone calm and respectful, even during difficult conversations, and ask open-ended questions to encourage deeper discussions.
Timing also matters, so choose a quiet, comfortable setting for important conversations and try not to discuss sensitive topics when either of you is stressed or tired. Be willing to compromise, practice forgiveness, and if communication issues persist, consider taking individual therapy for relationship issues to help you improve your communication skills and enable you to work on your relationship problems in a more positive light.
- Practice Active Listening
Active listening means giving your full attention to someone when they are speaking without interrupting or formulating your response. Regularly doing this in your marriage tells your partner that you value his thoughts and feelings, which leads to better understanding and empathy, stronger emotional connection, and effective resolution of conflicts.
Aside from patiently listening, make it a point to reflect on what he said, then paraphrase it to him to prevent miscommunication and demonstrate your genuine attempt to understand his perspective. Empathy goes a long way as well, so put yourself in your partner’s shoes, acknowledge his feelings, and validate his emotions.
- Show Appreciation And Gratitude
Expressing gratitude and appreciation for your spouse’s efforts, kindness, and support can positively impact the health of your relationship. It can strengthen the emotional bond between partners, increase happiness and satisfaction, improve communication, reduce stress and conflict, and boost self-esteem and confidence.
You can show your appreciation in many ways, and you don’t need big and elaborate gestures because even the simplest actions can mean a lot when done with total sincerity. For example, take the time to express your gratitude verbally, write heartfelt notes or letters, show affection through physical touch, spend quality time together, and perform acts of kindness. Also, remember to acknowledge your partner’s achievements and be a good listener to create a supportive and open environment.
- Set Healthy Boundaries
While being in a marriage or committed relationship means sharing your life with another person, it doesn’t mean losing your sense of self, personality, and identity. You are still you, and you have your mindset and preferences, which may not necessarily align with your partner’s, and that should be okay. This is why setting healthy boundaries in a marriage is crucial for maintaining a solid and fulfilling relationship.
There are no fixed rules or standards when establishing and maintaining boundaries, and it can be about anything – from limiting the time you spend with extended family, handling finances, or dividing household responsibilities. However, it is crucial that you and your partner clearly understand what these boundaries are and why they are there in the first place. As such, make sure to use clear communication and be assertive when discussing your needs and expectations with each other, thus creating a balanced and supportive relationship where both of you feel valued and understood.
- Learn To Compromise And Negotiate
Disagreements and conflicts are inevitable in any relationship, which is why learning to compromise and
negotiate is crucial for maintaining harmony in your marriage. This means being open to understanding your spouse’s perspective, finding common ground, and working together to find a solution that satisfies both parties.
To do this, start by appreciating the unique qualities you each bring to the relationship and recognize that differing opinions can lead to growth and understanding. When negotiating, remember that your partner is on your side and is not an enemy, so maintain a collaborative mindset and value each other’s input. Finally, find common ground and be willing to give and take so you can both be satisfied with the outcome, then check in regularly to ensure that your spouse is also comfortable with the compromises made.